97. The “I Want To Be Like…” Syndrome

Ever caught yourself thinking, “I want my wellness concept to be like so and so?” 

You’re not alone. 

But what if I told you that blindly following someone else’s success formula could actually set you up for failure? 

Today, I’ll break down the "I Want to Be Like..." Syndrome—why it happens, how it holds you back, and what to do instead.

In my 20+ years in the wellness and hospitality industry, I’ve seen this play out time and time again—boutique hotel owners and wellness leaders wanting to replicate the success of big brands without questioning if it actually fits their own vision, market, or guest needs. 

I’ve even been guilty of this myself. 

But here’s the harsh truth: what worked for them at their chapter 25 won’t necessarily work for you at your chapter one.

There’s a psychological reason for this too. In his book Pre-Suasion, Robert Cialdini explains how we naturally defer to authority. 

We see a brand as an industry leader, and we assume that everything they do must be right—even when it doesn’t make sense for our business. This mindset can be dangerous, especially when we stop questioning, innovating, and tailoring wellness concepts to fit our own unique market.


In today's episode, you'll discover:

→ Why wellness leaders and hotel owners fall into the “I Want to Be Like…” trap.
→ The three common profiles of people who struggle with this syndrome (and how to break free).
→ How to balance inspiration with critical thinking so you don’t repeat another brand’s mistakes.


By the end of this episode, you’ll know exactly why you’re drawn to a brand you consider authority and you’ll be able to pre-empt your urge to defer your critical thinking criteria to them.

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Are you ready to take wellness to the next level?


Here are 2 ways I can help:


1️⃣  WHO: Wellness directors who want to join 1% of wellness leaders


📌 WHAT: The Wellness Asset Academy
A 10-week online group programme where I guide you through my 7-step ESSENCE framework. Achieve higher pay and secure a genuine seat at the hotel’s big table—so wellness is no longer the most neglected area in the hotel.

→  Join the waitlist here.



2️⃣  WHO: Owners of small, independent hotels with a strong wellbeing focus


📌 WHAT: Asset Builder Mentorship
Exclusive 6-month 1:1 mentorship programme to master creating a wellness asset, build a proud team, and deliver transformative experiences for your guests.

→  Become a steward of true hospitality.



💡 Why work with me?

I know what works with wellness and I also know what doesn’t. I’ve made the mistakes so you don’t need to – saving you thousands of dollars on bad decisions.

✅ #1 best-selling author, global wellness expert 
✅ 40+ projects in 20+ countries across Europe, Middle East and Asia Pacific 
✅ Top brands: Abadía Retuerta, Four Seasons Hotels & Resorts, Accor, Six Senses Resorts & Spas 
✅ Interviewed over 150+ hoteliers worldwide